Always a bridesmaid, never someone to think that not getting married is something to be ashamed about. While your spring weekends may be booked with the weddings of friends, coworkers and acquaintances, you don’t cringe when the other guests ask about your own wedding date—you take pride in confidently announcing that you don’t know and aren’t worried about it. Welcome such questions with irony by wearing a huge, fake ring that says, “I don’t need a man to put a rock on this finger.” Wear it on your right hand, just to confuse those matchmaking busybodies (and not to scare away any potential groomsmen, even if you’re just seeking a short-term fling). Try out the TomKat (no explanation necessary, I’m sure), a gaudy, over-the-top choice for $35.95 from Inspired Silver.
—Ali
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